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Pacific Rim and The Art Of Simplicity

“Rawr, rawr, mother fucker!!!! I’m a mother fucking monster!!! Rawr, rawr!!!!!” – The Monster

I used to have a go to move back when I first started balling broads. I called it the Tallahassee Twister. First, I’d start by swirling my tongue around the chick’s eye. Then, once she moaned a little, I’d flip her around and give her ass a massage. (Ladies love a good ass massage.) Next up comes the bends and grind, where I’d squeeze her legs together, fold them over my shoulders, and then insert my penis into her vagina.

Now, obviously, hindsight being what it is, I understand that all this work isn’t actually necessary during sex. I was making things far, far too complicated. And, while I’ve never had a bad review from a lady (Whatever Tanya told you is a fucking lie.), I didn’t realize that fucking is best when it’s straightforward, without all the frills. In a lot of ways the same can be said of a good action movie. Lately, they’ve been so complex and bloated it’s hard to remember that, at one point, an action movie consisted of a good guy fighting a bad guy. Pacific Rim harkens back to a simpler time and it’s a better movie for it.

Pacific Rim is about a dimensional rift that opens up, sending crazy ass giant monsters onto earth. They kill a whole bunch of people, as monsters are want to do. Then humans are like, “Fuck these assholes that keep killing us. Let’s kill them for a change.” So they make these giant ass robots and spend two hours fighting monsters.

Pacific Rim is straight forward like that. There aren’t any plot twists or third act hi-jinks. It gives you exactly what it sells: monsters fighting robots. It’s easy to enjoy a film that wears its sleeve like that. Cause, I don’t know about you, but when I go watch a film about monsters fighting robots, I pretty much only want to see monsters fighting robots.

And oh boy do they ever fight. Great, intense sequences that are simply filmed. Cause another pit most action films have fallen into lately is the hyper-kinetic-ever-shifting-camera action scenes. And those are a chore to follow. You can never tell who is doing what or where they’re doing it.

Pacific Rim favors steady wide shots that clearly show the action and further the narrative. The viewer always knows which robot is fighting what monster and why. And, because it’s so easy to understand the stakes, the film is easy to root for.

Hopefully one day action directors can chill out and realize, much like sex, an action film doesn’t need a convoluted plot or complicated action shots. It just needs a good guy to root for and a bad guy to get punched.

Grade: A-


About dudebroreviews

I like banging chicks, drinking brews, and ordering porn on demand. Like the biggest boss you've ever seen.

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